I would love to say that I have been given the gift of speaking (not in tongues ha) eloquently, but alas I realized I do not have such a gift. I mean, dont get me wrong, I can speak to anyone about anything, but sometimes I get my words all mixed up or say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Basically, my mouth moves faster than my brain. Give me a speech and I can read it perfectly, and maybe even fool people into thinking I am eloquent. But give me "small talk" with a complete stranger and you are bound to hear me say something ridiculous. This has become such a humorous part of my life that my brother, Josh, and I have a tendency to call each other whenever one of us says something ridiculous, or someone around us does so.

I say all this because I have decided to devote an entire post to those hilarious hiccups that so frequently find their way out of my mouth. But before I list out some of my favorites, I believe it is appropriate to share the infamous story that Josh will never let me live down:

During the christmas break of my senior year in high school, Josh and I were doing some christmas shopping. Of course, the mall was packed and people were everywhere. We were walking out of a department store, and as we were passing a large group of people walking into the store I made eye contact with someone who looked very familiar. It was obvious that both me and this guy were trying to figure out how we knew each other and as we passed it clicked... He was a barista at the Starbucks that i regularly visited. It clicked with him too and as we were pushed in opposite directions by all the hustle and bustle of christmas cheer, he shouted over his shoulder "hey, how are you?" and I replied, with my great manners "good, how are you?"...ok, rewind. This story would sound completely normal if the conversation had been as previously stated. I wasn't aware of the ridiculous thing I had said until Josh was bent over dying laughing. Apparently, what I had heard barista-boy say was nothing close to what had actually came out of his mouth. The actual interchange went like this:

Barista-boy: "Merry Christmas!!!"
Kayla: "Good, How are you?"

Baha! As I am typing this I can't help but laugh. Still definitely one of the top funniest moments in my life. If you aren't understanding the humor in that, say it out loud, and picture the whole scene. It was truly incredible!

Ok, so back to some of the best mess ups I've said or heard (some of these are very common ):

1. Toin coss (meant to say coin toss)
2. Between two people: "hey, how are you?" "good, how are you?" "good, how are you?"
3. "Happy Birthday!" "you too!"
4. Waiter to customer: "Enjoy" "you too!"
5. "The nile-infested crocodile river"... meant to be "The crocodile-infested Nile river"
6. "Come back and see us," "you too!"
7. Ticket stub ripper to customer: "Hope you like the movie" "you too!"
8. "Your hair is getting so long" "you too!"
9. So this one will have to be censored: I had two friends named Mitch and Briana, and one day they walked into the caf and I exclaimed, "oh look, its Mriana and *itch"

(basically "you too" gets me into a lot of trouble)

All these thoughts on awkward sayings/ interchanges with people made me think of yet again, another funny situation involving Josh and I. So I will leave you with this story:

This was years ago. We were at church and it was the time where everyone is mingling and saying hello, shaking hands, and introducing themselves. Josh and I are being introduced to some guy and as he reaches out to shake my hand, Josh also thinks he is going to shake his, so we both end up shaking hands with him at the same time. Imagine my hand in the middle of this "hand shake sandwich." The best part is that it was so completely awkward and the guy didnt know what to do but Josh and I immediately started laughing and couldn't think of what to say so we just walked away. We are a mess.

So if I ever meet you and am forced to carry on small talk, I will apologize right now for any inappropriate saying or unneccessary comment made.

Nood gight!